“When I look down, even now, at the extra skin on my belly, it’s a reminder that I’ve done something spectacular. It’s a reminder that I’m a superhero. And I’m proud of it.” – Kristen Bell
Have you ever had one of those days that seem to be on autopilot, going through the motions of motherhood? Have you ever sat down at the end of the day and realized that you did nothing for yourself in the hours that you were awake besides using the bathroom and eating?
Sometimes, it feels like the weight of motherhood and everything that needs to be done is so strong that I feel like I could fall down. I feel like I can’t take another step, can’t wipe another counter or argue one more minute with my daughter.
Some days, I don’t even know who I am anymore. Besides being a wife and a mother, who is that person I see staring back at me in the mirror?
For so long, I had lost myself in motherhood. I had lost the person that I was before becoming a mom, I honestly didn’t even remember how to be that person.
Trust me when I say, you are not alone. There are so many mothers that I talk to who are just drowning in motherhood. Who have put their dreams aside and are just barely getting through the day.
When those little babies enter this world and make you a mommy, your life changes. You change. And you know what? That’s okay.
Your life is not your own anymore and your priorities shift. You sometimes have to sacrifice sleep, I love my sleep so this has been a hard one for me, or alone time with your spouse and nights out with your friends.
Those little people rely on you for everything. You are there to comfort, to feed, to teach, to nurture and to discipline. You are everything to them and in that, a lot of the time, us moms lose a part of ourselves.
While we are spending so much time taking care of everyone else, we forget to take care of ourselves. We forget to make ourselves a priority too. If you feel like you will never have enough time to chase your dreams now that you are a mom, I am here to tell you that you are wrong. You may not be able to accomplish them today, or tomorrow, but you will.
In October of 2017, I launched this blog and finally achieved a dream that has been so close to my heart but felt impossible. I had put it so far on the back burner that I couldn’t even see it anymore. But here I am, months later, telling you that you can do it.
Motherhood doesn’t mean you have to let go of who you are.
Mama, you need to nurture those important parts of you that you have been neglecting. Have a dream? Go after it. Need more than five minutes of alone time? Tell your significant other. Lonely and want to meet more mom friends? Join a club or your local MOPS.
I promise you, it is possible to find yourself again. No matter what stage of motherhood you are in, you are so important and you are more than just “mom.” Let me repeat that again. You are so important.
It’s okay to be everything for everyone, but please, don’t forget yourself. Don’t forget to love yourself and practice self care, even if that just means a quiet shower that only lasts 10 minutes. You will feel so much better.
And mama, if you ever start to feel like you are falling or don’t know where to turn, always remember that you are not alone. If no one else has told you recently, I want you to know that I am here for you and I know how you feel. I have been there and I have come to the other side of the darkness and so can you.
Today, give yourself some grace and love on those babies. There is nothing quite like motherhood and we are all in this together, even if we have never met face to face.
From one mom who has lost herself to another, you got this and you will find yourself again!